Pregnoramus

I feel like Lisa Simpson when she couldn't solve the brain teaser.

It's a clinically proven fact that a woman's brain physically shrinks in size when she is pregnant. I'm not entirely sure why. It could be something to do with hormones, fluid retention, or anything. I remember discussing this with my ob/gyn during my last pregnancy. It struck me as being rather unfortunate timing as I was in the middle of writing my thesis at the time. He seemed to think it was funny, particularly when he pointed out (rather unsympathetically, I thought) that there had been no research conducted to investigate whether a woman's brain returns to its substantive size post-pregnancy.

Well, I am currently conducting just such an investigation, based entirely on my own narrow experience. Preliminary results indicate that there must be some corrosion of brain size (and possibly brain function) with each subsequent pregnancy. It seems to be a similar (though opposite) process to post-pregnancy weight issues. (Apparently, whatever weight a woman manages to get down to when she falls pregnant again is the lowest weight that she will be able to reach after that pregnancy. Depressing, huh?)

Anyway. I had an appointment with my ob/gyn yesterday and before I left the house in the morning, I made doubly sure that I had my cheque book so that I could pay more of the fee. (I don't normally carry it around with me, so I had to go and get it.) I had my scan and my appointment and when I was making my next appointment, I started searching for the cheque book. No sign of it. I took everything out of my bag. I started to freak out slightly. I left the clinic. I sat on a park bench and ransacked every nook and cranny of my handbag. No cheque book.

'Oh Christ! I've lost it. This bloody handbag, I'm always dropping things and losing things out of it. I'll have to buy a new one. And cancel the bloody cheque book...'

I got home in the afternoon and checked the kitchen and the sitting room. I picked David up from the creche and checked that I hadn't left it in his bag or underneath the buggy. I was waiting for Conor to get home so I could check the floor of the car. And then, when I had given up hope and was pootling around looking for something else, I found it. In the spot where it's normally kept. Having purposely gone to get it and put it in my bag, I had then put it back in its place, without having any recollection of doing so. I still don't remember putting it back.

My brain is shrinking.