Nicest Beard Competition

To those of you who have been following the trials and tribulations of my life, or just reading my blog and the comments on it, I am pleased to announce that I will be sitting in judgement at the "Nicest Beard Competition" tonight.

This event will be held in the Life Bar, Irish Life Mall, Dublin 1 (Ireland, not Texas, for any of my geographically-challenged readers) from 5.30 this evening.

My sources tell me that there are just two combatants remaining in the contest. One went off to Thailand, where presumably, beard-growing is an optional occupation; the other gave up and shaved a fortnight ago on the grounds that he wasn't meeting enough women who were willing to kiss his hirsute visage. Apparently, the kissing (or lack thereof) was a greater danger to his self-esteem than being beaten by his peers, jeered at for being pussy-whipped and generally being humiliated in public. His testosterone-levels will also be called into question at the judging ceremony.

I will report back to my loyal readers tomorrow and let them know who won the coveted moniker of "Nicest Beard" - and no, we don't mean the "nicest lesbian companion of a gay man", though the talk of testosterone could have been misleading...